Zippy Gets a Cold Sore

If you thought that I would be able to write something profound every single day, you are sadly mistaken. What did you expect, I would roll out of bed with flowery words dripping my from my tongue and a gung-ho attitude of "I am going to write the great American novel today?" Well, that's not how it works. Most of my days start just like yours, with a dry mouth and crust around my eyes.

That paints a pretty picture, doesn't it? I thought that would get your attention.

Come to think of it, this whole "blog" concept might be a bad idea. I mean, who wants to have all that pressure hanging over their heads? Not me. Just look at the first sentence you see when you click "create a post." It says "write a catchy title." Right there, you know you are doomed. What, being a writer isn't good enough? Now I have to be a marketing expert and a slogan writer? The next thing you know is they will expect me to write a theme song for when I am required to record a video version of this blog.

A video version - right, who wants to look at this ugly mug? I rest my case: I am off on a bad start, and it's only going to get worse.

Oh, great, now they want me to add a picture. Now I have to do a Google search for "cold sores" or else I will be accused of false advertising practices. Then I am supposed to "choose categories." I was going to select "garbage," but I don't see any listed. It's blank.

Okay, maybe if I add a few hashtags, I can call it a day. Let's see what happens. #introduction #blogintroduction #humor #satire #garbage #junk #sex That ought to work.

If I were you, I wouldn't follow me. I have to. I'm stuck with myself. You have been warned.